Weblog Wannabe

Female or Shemale, can you tell? I got 12 of 16 right. I thought I'd be able to get all of them right, but some of the shemales look even more beautiful than the real females and, well, as the saying goes, looks can be deceiving :) ♥

A Comparison of Popular Online Fonts: Which Size and Type is Best? Interesting article. Now I'm considering using Verdana again since, according to research, it appears to be the best overall font choice. In case you don't know it already, Verdana at 11px is very pretty. ♥

According to The Mighty Slack Quiz, I'm not a slacker. I wonder when my transformation from a major slacker into a non-slacker happened. I sure didn't notice it at all. Hell, I'm not even sure I'm not a slacker anymore. ♥

The Matrix is an online game with an interface that looks like what you'd expect to see on a computer screen in movies. It sounds interesting but I haven't got around to playing it because my dad is going to be home anytime now. Eeek! ♥

If you feel like playing God, play Wrath of God and kill some stick figures, cows, and sheep with a lightning. No humans nor animals are actually harmed in the process. Today's war really should have been conducted virtually. ♥

Friday Evening Haiku

Where has the day gone?
The evening fell much too soon
I hate tomorrow.

I hate today's politics because it's not very logical at all. Let me explain it to you in a simple analogy. Say, Matt and Jordan have been friends for as long as they can remember. Troy is one big, mean, powerful bully and he and his little friends like to pick on Jordan and one day, Jordan can't stand it anymore so he teams up with Matt, who happens to be Troy's biggest enemy, to beat the crap out of Troy, which I think is the most logical thing to do under that circumstances. In today's politics, Jordan has no right to do so. Why? Because Matt is Troy's biggest enemy. Huh? Politics are sooo stupid. ♥

Do you aspire to be a hit man? Hit Man: A Technical Manual for Independent Contractors is the (online) book you need to read to succeed. At least one man has been sentenced to death, thanks to this book. Do you want to be the next? ;) ♥

I know it's not nice to laugh at other people's misfortune, but this headline really cracks me up: World's Top Road Safety Expert Killed By Bus. Oh the irony! And now I feel guilty. ♥

Which Lego character are you? I am the Lego Space Man! "You love technology, and look forward to the future. You're brave, active, and strangely attracted to shiny objects." Er, not really... ♥

Those who know me well enough should know that I have a thing for gay guys. The author of A Straight Person's Guide To Gay Etiquette guarantees that "after you've read and absorbed the information available to you in this gem of a volume, you'll have gay and lesbian acquaintances lining up around the block for the sheer pleasure of breaking the news to someone as sophisticated and savvy as you are." Cool! :) ♥

I didn't know that "Britney Spears" was really that hard to spell. They all spelt "Spears" correctly, though. Anyway, the link leads to a page at Google with data of mispellings as detected by their spelling correction system for the query "britney spears". ♥

This Lee Jeans commercial will never make it to Indonesian television, that's for sure. And for a very good reason. I think it would be really awkward to see that kind of commercial when you're watching TV with your parents or with a member of the opposite sex. Not to mention that the buttocks look kind of creepy. ♥

Wednesday Evening Haiku

The rain has just stopped
The humidity is high
It's so hot, hot, hot!

Have you ever dreamed of attending your own funeral? I have that kind of dream pretty often. It's not really as depressing as you think. In fact, I find those dreams rather pleasant and comforting.

You see, I'm always worried that no one would cry for me when I die. But in my dreams, there's always someone crying over the loss, which is cool. It doesn't mean that I want my funeral to be full of tears. If I should die, I want the people who knew me to celebrate my life and be happy instead of mourning over my death.

Well, enough morbid thought. Better start blogging. ♥

Play these logic games in Flash and see how far you can go. I've only passed Game 1, but I'm sure I'm going to go far. Well, up until Game 5 anyway because after Game 5, you're going to have to register to be a member before you can play the next games. ♥

Infrequently Asked Questions: Sex have answers to a bunch of burning questions such as How To Satisfy A Woman Every Time, What If Condoms Had Corporate Sponsors, and How To Be Manly. (Tasteless/sexist jokes abound.) ♥

What programming language are you? I am Perl. "You're chic and easy going. You can't do everything but you're good at connecting with others to help you overcome this." The description is good, but Perl? Yuck! I'd rather be PHP, really. ♥

Check out the winners of the Second Annual Worst Manual Contest and laugh. My favourite is the Runner-Up #2. It's supposed to provide the solution to a 6-color puzzle cube (Rubic Cube?), but the manual is in black & white. Go figure. ♥

Ninja Mask Lessons by Vern Reid will show you how to make a ninja mask from a black t-shirt in 7 easy steps. It's pretty amusing. I can't wait to try it out! ♥

Tuesday Evening Haiku

It's one hot evening
Even though it was raining
I am still melting.

Last night I watched an Australian movie about the love lives of a bunch of university students called "Love and Other Catastrophes" and it made me miss being a student even more. I fell in love with one of the songs in the soundtrack, "Sunday Morning" by Velvet Underground. It has a nice beat. I think I should listen to punk music more often. It's been proven to put me in a better mood. ♥

What's your high school label? I'm unique. "Looks like your kind is not listed. You are your own person. Don't give in to their ways. Be yourself. After all, there's not many out there like you." Wheee! ♥

I've been a really angry girl today. Playing the Duck Game was very therapeutic. It helped me release my anger. Now I'm feeling so much better. My highest score was 8700. I don't know how some people could score tens of thousands in that game. Does anyone? ♥

Right after September 11, I couldn't read some random weblogs without getting thoroughly pissed off by the narrow-mindedness of some of the writers. Then things got back to normal. But now, six months later, it's happening all over again.

If you ever caught me reading any weblog that doesn't belong to the tolerant people I'm proud to call my friends, please slap me silly with a large trout. Thanks in advance. ♥

Note to self: Stop being so damn bitter or you'll lose the few friends you still have left as well. You don't want that to happen, don't you? ♥

I miss having a friend to whom I could write about anything that bothers me in an email and sent it off to them, knowing that they care, and I'd feel better. I used to have such friend, but one day he just disappeared into thin air. Sigh.

I don't believe in undying friendship just as much as I don't believe in undying love. ♥

Am I the only one who's not interested in the Oscars? Don't get me wrong. I love movies. But I'm just not interested in knowing which movies or actors or directors win an Oscar. I mean, it's always the same every year. Same victory speeches, maybe different faces. What's so interesting about that?

"Oooh, "Lord of the Rings" won [insert number here] Oscars!" No, I don't really care. But being a true weblogger, I just wanted to be the first to blog that.

(Yes, I'm still in a bitchy mood. You can blame my parents for that.) ♥

Monday Morning Haiku

What a hot morning!
I am so quickly melting
And all my fish died.

But I don't want to talk about the poor fish. It's too depressing. I just feel like blogging some random things that no one will find interesting.

My brother came home from a graveyard shift this morning bringing me something for breakfast, knowing that I very rarely had breakfast. He's the best. Well, almost the best. I still had to bribe him to give me a ride to the computer store yesterday.

I'm such a lousy orange picker that my mother always has to grade my pick of oranges every time I buy some. The last time I did, I got two oranges "wrong" and my brother said, "6 points! Not bad, sis!" Yea right. I was aiming for a perfect 10.

My parents are depressing me, but there's no news there. I should've got used to it since they haven't got along for 18 years but I just can't. Maybe I should just concentrate on my brothers. At least they amuse me. ♥

Do you feel like taking some silly online quizzes? Well, you can find more quizzes than you can shake a stick at at LiveJournal's Meme Tracker. It makes me wonder if taking online quizzes is all that LiveJournallers do. ♥

At the Musearts Cartoons Fly In Theater you can watch some guinea pigs playing their rendition of "Sound of Music", "Romeo and Juliet", and some other classical works. You'd wish you'd never seen it. ♥

Damn. All this time I thought I was already the ultimate minority weblogger. But according to my friend Emlyn, in order to become the ultimate minority, I still need to become not only a lefty, but also a lesbian, polyamorous, satanist, necrophiliac. Eeek! I think it would also help if I were a serial killer. ♥

Sunday Evening Haiku

A new monitor!
I've got a new monitor!
I can see colours!

After being virtually colour blind for 10 months, I finally can see the worldwide web in technicolour again. Yippeee!!! I've been spending the last 30 minutes just browsing some weblogs, taking all the colours in. The web is indeed a very colourful place.

Oh, I almost forgot. Yesterday I received a lovely postcard of Los Angeles and another of Santa Monica from Marisa and a packet of sunflower seeds, wannabe sticker, and card from Vikki in the mail, which really made my day. Thanks a bunch, girls! Expect something in the mail soon! :) ♥

How Canadian are you? I'm 44% Canadian. Heh. ♥

What's wrong with the Oscars? Well, the article has got everything covered. It's a bitchy article, but I like it. Mostly because I'm in a bitchy mood right now due to something someone wrote me in an email. ♥

This discussion about race issue in online community really makes me want to scream "oh, the humanity" from the top of my lungs, so, "OH, THE HUMANITY!!!" There. I'm feeling better now. ♥

Oooh, looky! They've got the finalists for the 2002 Messiest Apartment Contest already! None of them is anyone I know. How disappointing. It seems like 22-23 is the messiest age range. ♥

This bunny loves your cursor. It really does. I don't want a bunny anymore for my birthday. Now I want a love bird. I saw one at the pet shop yesterday and it was really, really cute! And really expensive, too.

I actually want an iguana more, but as my brother told me, if mum saw the iguana, it would give her heart attack. I want my mum to live many, many more years because I want her to be able to see me happy at last, so an iguana is out of question. ♥

Saturday Evening Haiku

Hot and cold and hot
It's two seasons in one day
It's no fun at all.

I was so close to buying a new monitor today, but of course stupid me had to screw up. See, before I left to buy the monitor, I checked the monitor plug that connected it to my computer to see how many holes it had, just to be sure. The stupid thing is, the plug that I was checking turned out to be the plug that connected the modem to my computer, and not the monitor plug, so none of the monitors sold at the computer stores had a plug that looked like what I described. I was so disappointed, thinking that my computer must've been so old that none of today's monitors was compatible with it. But when I got home, I checked the plug again and realised that I had checked the wrong plug before I left. Doh! No wonder the guys who waited on us at the computer stores were looking at me funny when I told them that my monitor at home had a plug with 25 holes on it. Stupid, stupid, stupid!!! Now I have to wait yet another week to get the monitor. Boohoo! If only I hadn't been so stupid... ♥

"Across The Universe" is such a beautiful song. I like Rufus Wainwright's rendition of the song better than the original Beatles version.

"Limitless, undying love, which shines around me like a million suns,
And calls me on and on across the universe"

Can blood type determine character? The Japanese seem to believe that it can. My blood type is O and according to them, it means I'm "calm, patient, in control of their emotions, strong-willed, unyielding and full of self-confidence despite a quiet appearance". I wish. ♥

Apparently, if I were a Disney princess, I'd be Belle. Hmm. Isn't she the chick from "Beauty and the Beast"? I'm not so sure. Mind you, my Disney quotient is very low. ♥

Tim brought to my attention that the sponsored link for the search term "child safe chat rooms" in Google was "Sexy Chat & Webcam Rooms". Very targeted indeed.

If you happen to have a(n) (un)lucky IP address (like me) and can't see it, here's a screenshot of the page with the search results. ♥

The tagline of "Miserable Melodies", which is a site with a collection of 94 songs sung by the likes of Burt Reynolds, Brent Spiner, John Travolta, Fabio, and of course, your favourite William Shatner, is "recorded with good intentions...and bad results". And it's very appropriate. ♥

Friday Night Haiku

Oh what a weather
Hot today, cold tomorrow
I prefer the cold.

Well, I haven't been feeling like blogging lately. In fact, I haven't been feeling like doing anything. Most of the time, I just lie there on my bed, staring at the wall while listening to some depressing songs. I must say that I've been in a much better state than this.

Anyway, I have to force myself to do something to distract me from whatever it is that's depressing me every once in a while just to keep my sanity so here I am. I just hope I'll be able to find something blogworthy. ♥

Last night I was chatting with my oldest blogging friends, Nikolai (who has a new feature up) and Jordan, at the same time and I thought, "Hey, this is just like in the old days!" But then it hit me that back in the old days (read: two years ago), Jordan wouldn't want to chat on any instant messenger. Heh.

Anyway, Jordan gave me an idea to create a quiz called "What ICQ Status Am I?" a couple of days ago, which he thought was lame but I thought was brilliant. So I did. Here's my ICQ status:

WinRG (Really Good Edition) is a pretty amusing parody of Windows XP. I think I saw it being blogged everywhere some time ago but didn't get to click the link until today. Just thought I'd blog it, just in case you missed it. ♥

Furtive Invaders is just like Space Invaders, only instead of shooting some ships, you get to shoot some bear heads. Yeah, it's really that absurd and also fun for about two minutes. ♥

Google Weblog, which is is not affiliated or endorsed by Google, Inc., aims to track news about the latest additions and modifications to the Google site from various sources. Nice. ♥

Have you ever been emailed by the dead? If you have, they'd like to hear from you provided you're willing to submit the site to the search engine of the universe (whatever it is) when you die. Talk about being eternally hit-obsessed ;) ♥

Barely Thursday Morning Haiku

A cheeseball dinner
That I am having right now
Is pretty yummy.

The only alternative was my mother's hot chicken curry. I already had it for breakfast and lunch and every time it gave me a tummyache. I guess my tummy is not very Asian. It just doesn't deal with spicy food very well. That's also the reason I don't eat very often when I'm home. Parents always cook spicy stuff, I can't cook to save my life, and I don't always have money to buy my own food. Maybe I deserve to starve to death.

(And yes, this post was originally entitled "Wednesday Evening Haiku".) ♥

Which Mythological Creature Would You Be? I'm the Dragon. Must be because I like to sing "Puff the Magic Dragon". It's the song I always find myself sing when I feel like singing but can't think of any song to sing. ♥

Ever wish you could smash a kitty with a hammer without actually killing it? Well, thanks to the wonder of Flash animation, now you can. I managed to smash 25 kittens before I got bored. ♥

If you have a CD burner, five blank CDs, and some music on your computer, you can participate in the Weblogger CD Swap. The music has to be summer-themed, though. There has to be plenty of summer-themed songs out there, but the only one I could think of right now is "Endless Summer Night" by Richard Marx. Yeah, I hear you. Ewww. ♥

Tuesday Evening Haiku

What a cold, cold night
Crickets are singing for rain
More and more of rain.

I wasn't going to blog because I've been feeling really blah all day, but the more I'm not doing anything, the more depressed I become. I need something to keep me busy. Blogging sounds like a good idea.

I'm really getting tired of my emotional rollercoaster. Well, not only that. I'm also tired of not being able to concentrate, not having any motivation to do anything, having very short memory, and feeling suicidal. Just name any symptom of depression. I have it. If only seeing a psychiatrist weren't such a big deal...

Well, enough complaining. Better start blogging before tomorrow comes. ♥

If you have a PDA, you might want to install Tap, which is a PDA-based program that allows you to teach a virtual character to tap dance. Don't have a PDA? You can always download the screen saver. ♥

I scored 450 in the Mental Health Test, which means I'm mentally disturbed. The highest possible score in this test is 800 and the lowest possible score is 200. The higher the score, the crazier the person is. Hmm. I'm more than halfway to totally losing my mind. ♥

Monday Evening Haiku

I have had no meal
No breakfast, lunch, nor dinner
There's nothing I like.

And I've got sick of ramen and fried eggs. I've been living on ramen and fried eggs since I became unemployed, which was well over 5 months ago. Yup, I've been unemployed for that long. Not that I mind very much. Hadn't I quit my job, I wouldn't have had a chance to employ myself and do freelance design work.

I didn't hear any news about the job today. I hope that means I don't get it. Office work just doesn't make me happy. I'm applying for permanent jobs just to please my parents. I think it's time for me to think of my own happiness. If my parents want me to be happy, they should just let me be. ♥

Just in time for St. Patrick's Day (not that I know when St. Patrick's Day is exactly), check out 10 Disgusting Things Irish Traditional Flute Players Do. Ewww. ♥

From the silly quiz department comes Which HTML tag are you? I'm a <FONT> tag. I'm not too fond of that particular HTML tag. I mean, why use <FONT> tag when CSS can do it better? ♥

I think this Asian Pride video only applies to Asian in America (Asian-Americans?) but still it's pretty amusing. I found the singer's accent the most amusing. And I've always loved the song, "That's Just The Way It Is" (or so I think the title is). It doesn't matter whether the lyrics have been changed or not. It's just a very cool song. ♥

This article at Shift, Why It Sucks To Be Cool, is very, very true. If you've never been cool, you should rejoice. I know I do. "Offline or on, it's not an impossible task to become cool -- it's a pain in the ass just to stay cool." ♥

Sunday Evening Haiku

I hate mosquitoes
I wish they'd go somewhere else
Where they have some snow.

I've been thinking a lot lately about what I should and should not do in order to be happy. My main source of unhappiness is my inability to make my dreams come true. The logical solution to that problem would be to stop dreaming and start getting real. But if I stopped dreaming, there wouldn't be anything left to live for anymore. It's so frustrating. Sigh. ♥

Woo! My silly hit-obsessed quiz that's been up for only 2 days is already #1 search result for hit-obsessed in Google! Isn't it cool? Well, maybe not. I'm just easily pleased. ♥

According to the Serial Killer Quiz, if I were a serial killer, I'd be David Berkowitz a.k.a. Son of Sam. He claimed to be plagued by demons and killed 6 New York women. Uh, cool? ♥

If I didn't have such a limited online time, I'd play flashCHESS. It sounds like fun. If you play chess, do try to play it and tell me if you manage to beat the computer. Chess is the only sport I'm good at other than swimming. Not that I'm sure that chess is a sport. Or is it? ♥

If you are a Roald Dahl fan like me, you're going to enjoy reading the online and illustrated version of one of his short stories, Pig. Nothing compares to Dahl's absurd sense of humour. ♥

How long do you have to live? My average life span is 84 years old. By modifying my health, lifestyle, diet and environment I can live to be 99 years old. I was born on Saturday, April 07, 1973. I have lived 10,570 days and have 19,944 days left to live. I should die on Sunday October 22, 2056 at 6:16:07 AM. Honestly, I'm not sure I want to live that long. ♥

Saturday Evening Haiku

The rain is falling
And the thunders are rolling
I can't stop laughing.

My big brother was broke. He needed a haircut but he didn't have enough money to get it. So he asked his wife to give him one. The result was quite a disaster. His hair looked as if it had a hole on one side because that part of his hair was much shorter than the rest. I tried to fix it by making the hole a bit wider just so that it wouldn't look so much like a hole but more like a helipad or something. But instead of making it look better, I made it look even worse.

Sister-in-law and I just couldn't stop laughing at the sight of his hair. Sister-in-law begged brother to just go to the barber and get a proper haircut. At first brother insisted that we finished what we'd started because had he wanted to go to the barber, he wouldn't have asked his wife to give him a haircut. But after he saw what a major disaster his hair had become, he finally gave in.

I felt guilty for making his hair look even worse than before, so I gave him some cash before he left to the barber. I really hope that the barber would be able to save his hair so that he wouldn't be a laughingstock at his workplace tomorrow. I really shouldn't have practised my hairstyling skill on anyone but myself. I don't think I'd ever forget the look of horror on his face when he screamed, "Where is my sideburn?!?" Hehehe.

Brother just got back from the barber. He has a crewcut now. He said even the barber laughed out loud when he saw his disastrous hair. Poor brother :) ♥

Lord of the Rings fans might find Top Sekrit Lord of the Rings Diaries either amusing or boring. I haven't seen the movies so I found the diaries rather amusing. ♥

The Linux Virus Writing HOWTO will show you how to write Linux-infecting parasitic file viruses. Hmm. And all this time I thought Linux couldn't be infected by any virus. ♥

Globe of Blogs is a weblog directory, browsable by author's name, location, sex & age, birthday, and weblog's title. Register yours today. ♥

Friday Evening Haiku

Such a hot, hot day
Where has the rain gone away?
We could use some now.

It was such a hot day that one would immediately sweat as soon as they left the shower. I was also feeling blah all day, and the heat only made me feel even more blah. Now that the evening has fallen, the heat remains. I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight.

You know what's weird? If I go to bed while I'm feeling blah, I'll have a dreamless sleep, but if I go to bed while I'm in a good mood, I always have nightmares. Nightmares are fun, though. They make me feel good when I wake up, knowing that reality isn't really all that bad. ♥

Check out the 101 Dumbest Moments in Business and get a headache. Well, it did give me a headache since it's not really my cup of tea, but it might give you a giggle or two. ♥

View cellphone version of some well-known movies like "Indiana Jones", "Jaws" and "Karate Kid" at the Cell Phone Theater. No download required. ♥

If my darling Quack could read and he read about the TravelPig, I'm sure he'd be green with envy.

Hey, would you mind very much if I used a few bucks from the FirdaAid funds to send the little Quacksie off to travel? ♥

I don't know why anyone would want to convert any perfectly understandable word into hard-to-understand binary, but there you go. ♥

Due to popular request (yea right), I present yet another stupid weblogging quiz: Are You A Hit-Obsessed Weblogger? I scored 35%, which made me a Type C (Hit-Curious), whatever that means. How hit-obsessed are you? ♥

Thursday Afternoon Haiku

I am so hungry
I need to have lunch badly
But I'm too lazy.

At the mall I went to yesterday, there was a big clock. Every hour, six little tin men would come out from the right and left sides of the clock and play a really magical sounding music for about 5 minutes. While the tin men were playing the music in the first hour I was at the mall, I noticed that only small children seemed to be impressed by the show.

In the second hour I was there, I noticed there was one guy who seemed impressed by it other than the children. He had his girlfriend in tow and she didn't seem to be too impressed by it. In fact, she seemed bored. I dunno, maybe it's just my crazy idea that boyfriend and girlfriend should have the same interest and be fascinated by the same things. ♥

My dream car is not among the Ten Most Expensive Cars In The World. Is yours? All I want is a New VW Beetle. Not that I have a driver's licence. But if someone bought me my dream car, I'd get myself a driver's licence ;) It's not like I couldn't drive already. ♥

Mountain biking might not be extreme enough for Kris Holm, the One Tired Guy. That was probably the reason he started doing mountain unicycle. It's definitely not for me. ♥

American Dialect Society's Words of the Year 2001 include "shuicide bomb" (which means "terrorist with bomb in shoes"), "Osamaniac" (which means "woman sexually attracted to Osama bin Laden"), and many more rather amusing words and phrases. ♥

Wednesday Evening Haiku

I am so sleepy
But I don't want to sleep yet
I still need to blog.

I went to a rather posh mall today because I was bored senseless at home. I didn't really have any plan to buy anything. I just wanted to be out of the house. I was going to see "Vanilla Sky", but decided not to because, well, seeing a movie alone is just no fun.

Anyway, I ended up spending a lot of time in a bookstore. I could spend hours just looking at stuff sold at bookstores and record stores. I bought "The House at Pooh Corner" by A.A. Milne. It's been a really fun read. I like what Eeyore think about birthdays: "Here to-day and gone to-morrow." That's what birthdays are, exactly :) ♥

Kaycee Nicole Swenson has made it to the Museum of Hoaxes. Just thought you'd like to know :) It's been almost a year since Kaycee "died", eh? It feels like it was online yesterday. ♥

Is Google Microsoft Search a sign that Microsoft is going to acquire Google? Heaven forbids.

Speaking of Google, the programmers among you might be interested in joining the First Annual Google Programming Contest. The prize is $10,000 in cash. Not bad. You can help me pay my debts if you win ;) ♥

For some geeky fun, go check out Digital Data Porn. As mentioned in the warning, this site contains graphic images of extreme computer hardware. Turned on already? ;) ♥

Can you tell me what's wrong with this picture? ♥

If you think the world is overpopulated and the people that overpopulate it are stupid and should be killed, you might want to join The Kill Everyone Project. "Genocide has never been this easy! Or featured a chat." ♥

"Make room on your bookshelves and in your bedrooms for a new, improved -- and politically correct -- 'Kama Sutra'!" I'm sure you're dying to read it ;) ♥

If you live in America, you really must steal this book. It's really handy. And amusing, too. ♥

Barely Tuesday Morning Haiku

Three in the morning
I've been up for two hours
Slept for two hours.

I was going to post more links yesterday but I fell asleep and when I woke up, it was already past midnight. Bummer. I should've posted some placeholder entries. But I was too tired and sleepy to even think about it. Anyway, I think I'm going to start posting links again if I can since I'm already running out of things to say. Let's celebrate! :) ♥

Student Declares Roommates "Axis of Evil" for being involved in sponsoring acts of terror in the apartment, such as flaunting hot girlfriend around the apartment, making occupants feel really horny and lonely. Hehe. Is it really funny or am I just easily amused? ♥

Monday Evening Haiku

I'm so exhausted
After a busy weekend
And job interview.

There was nothing special about the interview. I came half an hour early and was escorted straight to the interviewer. I can't tell his nationality from his accent, but he's probably American. There was something about him that reminds me a lot of my old Canadian supervisor, back in my first job. I can't really tell what it was. He didn't ask me to tell him more about myself, which was great because I've always hated that part of interview. I should know whether I get the job or not within a week. ♥

My friend Emlyn wants me to spread this meme: Put an End to Word Attachments because "they impede people from switching to free software". It's a bit hypocritical for me to spread the meme, really, since I still send my CV as a Word attachment myself when I'm applying for jobs. But hey, I'll do anything for a friend :) ♥

Overheard at a wedding:

Girl #1: Oooh, the bride looks so beautiful!
Girl #2: All brides look beautiful.
Girl #3: We'll look beautiful too on our wedding day.
Girl #4: Oh come on. We're all beautiful already!

Some people think Girl #4 has very poor self-esteem. She thinks so, too. But she doesn't sound like someone with poor self-esteem, doesn't she? Can you guess who Girl #4 is? ;) ♥

The second wedding. The second wedding was this morning. It was my college best friend's wedding. I had to wait for half an hour outside to collect some courage to enter the building. Mind you, I didn't see anyone I know and I was so under-dressed. I already wore the only formal blouse I had to the first wedding. I wasn't going to come to the second one but then I thought my friend might be disappointed if I didn't show up, so I came anyway, wearing a long-sleeved, dark blue t-shirt and black pants.

Once I got inside the hall, I saw three familiar faces. All male. Soon I had three guys chatting me up and I thought, hey, this isn't so bad! Then some more college friends showed up and we had a little reunion. No one asked me when I'm going to get married because most of us were single fighters anyway and no one wanted to offend anyone. What everyone did ask was what I'm doing now. All I could say was I did some freelance web designing job, which was not really a lie. Hey, I have two clients!

I met the "date" from December at the wedding. I think he got kind of embarrassed when I mentioned about the date to the others *grins* "Great, now everyone knows about it," he grumbled. I just laughed out loud. A college friend that I know has always had a crush on the "date" suddenly got really friendly to me and asked me if I'd like a lift home. Of course I'd like that. I'm not too fond of public transportation in Jakarta because it's godawful. As it turned out, she gave me a lift because she wanted to know more about my date with the "date". I just told her as it was. I think she was relieved to know that we didn't do anything romantic :)

Anyway, I'm glad I came to the wedding because I got a lot of hugs there from the old college friends. Hugs are good. People really should hug more. Have you hugged anyone today? ♥

The first wedding. The first wedding I went to this weekend took place on Saturday morning in a luxurious ballroom. It was a distant cousin's wedding. How distant? Well, his mother is the sister-in-law of the late husband of my mother's sister. Yes, *that* distant. The wedding was lovely. The place was lovely, the music was lovely, but the food was not too lovely. I was glad I hijacked my brother's car for a bit on our way to the wedding and forced him to bring me to a supermarket so I could buy some bread to munch on.

Anyway, I met another distant cousin whom I hadn't seen for ages and whom I've always had a crush on. He looked so gorgeous in his suit. Sigh. He wasn't all that gorgeous when he was a kid. When we used to go for a vacation together many centuries ago, he was just this asthmatic boy who liked to sing some cheesy love songs and who never seemed to be quite "there", if you know what I mean. But I liked him anyway. It was so good to see him again yesterday and I'm really looking forward to the next time we meet, which is probably on my brother's wedding in July. Still four months to go. Ack!

If only I could get up the nerve to call him... ♥

Sunday Evening Haiku

Party animal
The worst way to describe me
Because I am not.

Dumb haiku, I know. But after going to two weddings, which is about one wedding too much for me to tolerate, I think I'm entitled to be dumb. Not that the weddings were godawful. Hell no. They were fun. And you know what? I learned something about me that I didn't know before. As it turned out, I'm quite outgoing! Wooo! But then again, I only hung out with people that I previously knew at the weddings so I guess it's not really a valid indicator of my sociability. But still, I used to be the quiet one, but now not anymore. I actually talked and said hi to people. That was scary. Where has the old, anti-social me gone? Did anyone see her? ♥

Two people suggested this quiz to me so I guess I should blog it: what rubber duck are you? I am the classic yellow squeeky toy. I'm the one, baby! ;)
♥

If my life were a movie, I think the genre would be melodramatic comedy. It's sad, but funny. How about yours? ♥

One morning in Firdaland...

Me: Susie called last night about a job. I think I'm going to apply for it.
Him: What kind of job?
Me: Developing a clearing house.
Him: Cool. Are they still looking for more applicants?
Me: Well, Susie said they were only looking for more female applicants. That was the reason she contacted me in the first place.
Him: What, you mean you are female?
Me: *sigh* I'm beginning to doubt it myself.

After all these years (and one date), I'm still one of the guys to him. Or worse still, I'm sexless. Ack! Anyway, it's funny that just when I was beginning to think that I had no friends, I got old college friends calling me. We must have telepathic connection after spending some crazy years together in college. Heh. ♥

One afternoon in Firdaland...

Me: Mum, I think I know what I want for my birthday.
Mum: What is it?
Me: A rabbit. I saw a really cute one at the mall today. I want it.
Mum: A rabbit? Don't you know that their pee really stinks?
Me: *pause* You mean rabbits pee?
Mum: All hot-blooded animals pee.
Me: Oh.

I always imagined rabbits to be a clean animal. So clean that they didn't pee. I felt somewhat disappointed to learn that they do pee. Maybe I should just stick to keeping fish. At least I know for sure that they don't pee. ♥

Barely Thursday Morning Haiku

Thursday already
Fifteen minutes past midnight
I should be sleeping.

Hehe. I just realise that I actually have enough money for a trip to Singapore. If only I didn't have debts to pay... God knows I could use a vacation. Being unemployed is no holiday, you see. It's very tiring psychologically. If you don't believe me, just quit your job today and experience it for yourself.

On a totally unrelated note, Blogger really should make the textarea in Blogger editor a bit bigger in Opera. It's just so tiny! ♥

There's a bit of news from the job front. An old college friend just called to ask me if I'd be interested in joining a project to build a national clearing house on state autonomy. The clearing house will be accessible through the web and will have a searchable database. If they hired me, I'd be responsible for the website. I might go for it. The job does sound kind of boring, but at least it's not permanent. I'm not really interested in permanent jobs. I'm weird that way. ♥

Opera 6 users should notice that this page looks much better now. That's because I finally got around to installing the browser on my poor, old computer which allowed me to test the layout in it. I noticed that Opera 6 was only 3.2MB in size and I still had, like, 70MB left in my hard drive so what the heck.

Anyway, I still haven't managed to upgrade my browser to IE6 because every time I tried, the installation always failed due to the lack of space, so if you're an IE6 users, I need your feedback. I'd love to hear from Netscape 6 users as well. Is the right column still under the other columns in Netscape? ♥

If I created yet another stupid weblogging quiz, would people think of it as a way to get hits? No, don't answer it. The truth is, I don't care. People are free to think whatever they want to think and I'm free to do whatever I want to do. Right? Right??? Right.

And by golly, how could you guys think of this site as "not lame"? You must love me very much to think that. You're so sweet. I love you, too. No smiley there. I'm not joking. I mean it. Yes, I do. ♥

The only way I could get the money to go for my great escape would be from selling the house. The house worths at least US$15,000. I only need $3000. Mum once told me that the house was going to be mine someday. If that was true, someday I'd be able to make my great escape!

I don't really know where I'm going to go in my great escape. If you asked me, I could only tell you that it's anywhere but here. So, if you have a comfortable couch I could crash on, do let me know and I might make it part of my great escape :) ♥

You know what's so disturbing? I actually considered building my own PC from scratch just then after seeing how low the price of hardware was. *shudders* Heaven forbids. Not that there's anything wrong with it. It's just that my personality and the act of PC building simply don't match. I'd either end up destroying every piece with my hidden electrical power or just abandon the project to rot once the idea wears off. Mind you, things get old with me really quickly. ♥

Wednesday Afternoon Haiku

Cloudy Wednesday
The rain hasn't fallen yet
It might fall tonight.

The internet cafe is rather quiet today despite the fact that this week is a week off for most school children. Not that I'm complaining. At least the connection speed is not too slow. Anyway, I just did a research on broadband ISPs and found that my area is not within the one and only cable company's coverage area so I'm still stuck with slow internet connection and expensive phone bill. There are about half a dozen ISPs that provide broadband internet here, but they all require you to have an account with the same cable company. Oh well. ♥

By the way, I finally received the Firda-Aid funds today. Yay! Thanks so much for donating, guys! Big thanks also go to Rebecca for putting up with PayPal's crap before they finally lifted the restriction on her account and to Phil for hosting the fundraising.

Anyway, I'd be only 100 dollars short, if only I didn't have to pay my father's phone bill this month. Since I do, I'm still 175 dollars away from getting my phone line back. If I didn't pay the bills this month, they'd fine me 50% of the whole amount and it would be even more impossible for me to pay it off. Damn the phone company :-\

Sigh. I really have to do some more research on the local broadband ISPs. Who knows, one of them might reach my area. Keep your fingers crossed! ♥

I hate murder flicks that insult my intelligence. I watched one on TV just then. I managed to figure out who the bad guy was after watching it for only 10 minutes. I thought the film would only last an hour, but it turned out to last two hours. I kept on watching just to confirm that I was right. Of course I was. It was such a dumb film. But still it was better than the alternative: "Dawson's Creek". Ick! ♥

Speaking of birthdays, TheBrad sang me the Rubberducky Song in honour of my birthday two years ago. Listening to the song always makes me smile :) It's definitely one of the best birthday gifts I've ever got. ♥

I used to enjoy birthdays until several years ago when my father decided to turn the supposedly happy occasion into a make-daughter-feel-like-hell day. I've been dreading my birthday since. Not because I hate getting older, but because of what comes with it: my father's preach on how to be more like the daughters of his friends. I wonder if he'd ever be able to accept me the way I am. My mother can, so why can't he? ♥

Tuesday Night Haiku

Had a bit of rain
But it is very hot still
More rain would be nice.

My father was home all day again so I had to wait until he went to bed before I could go online. I already turned off the modem's speaker but it still made some noises anyway when I dialed up. I sure hope my father didn't hear it. I have to check to see if my father is up every time I hear the sound of a door being opened. The phone downstairs is right in front of my father's room while the one upstairs is right in front of mine. They are paralleled to one phone line, which is the one I'm using to get online. It's my father's phone line. See why I have to sneak behind his back to get online? My own phone line has been cut off by the phone company in January because I haven't paid my bills, being broke and unemployed and all. ♥

My mother is really nervous about my brother's wedding in July because the wedding will surely cost some money and we're still penniless as ever. She has started collecting things to sell but it's not so easy because we already sold our more precious belongings in 1997, when Indonesia's economy was at its worst and we needed some cash to buy rice.

Except for the piano.

The piano is a big part of my childhood and teenage years, but I don't think I need it to remind me of the good old days. We really should sell it. No one is playing it anymore these days. Not even me. Got to tell mum about it tomorrow. ♥

My brother bought me a computer magazine today, from which I learned that computers are actually much cheaper than they were seven years ago when I bought my present computer. You can actually buy a Dell computer for less than US$300! Wow. The price might be even lower in the U.S. but it's Indonesia we're talking about. I also found that hard drives now have 20 times the capacity of my present hard drive and cost almost 50% less! It's crazy.

In case you're wondering, my present computer is a PC with Pentium 100 processor, 1.5GB HDD, 16MB RAM, with a 16 bit, greyscalish monitor. Bought it for about US$220. Truly a classic :)

My birthday is only a month and three days away *hint, hint!* ♥

My father didn't leave home at all today so I had to wait until he went to bed tonight before I could go online. I had to put two pillows on the modem so that it wouldn't cause too much noise and wake my father up when I dialed up. You know how noisy dialup modems can be. Anyway, I hope he's enjoying a good night sleep and won't wake up until tomorrow morning. I still feel like surfing around for a bit longer. ♥

I'm missing talking to someone. Some people here believe that if you have an eyelash falling off, that means someone is missing you. If we know each other and we've talked and you have an eyelash falling off, you might be the person I miss talking to :)

Silly superstition, I know. But it's always good to know. If you don't believe it, at least you can have a laugh over it. ♥

Monday Evening Haiku

Another hot day
Looks like the rainy season
Has already passed.

It's Monday again. Last Monday feels like only yesterday. I used to believe that time flies when you're having fun, but now not anymore. I'm not really having fun, yet time flies just as quickly. I guess time also flies when you know what to expect from your life. In my case, it's nothing. I expect nothing. When I do get something, I'll think of it as a bonus. Everyone loves bonuses. I'm no exception. ♥

This is my pathetic attempt to write a story using all the words listed on Daypop top 10 searches:

"Nick Cook, Bea Arthur, and Chu Mei-Feng are travelling together. Among the places they're going to visit are India and Israel. They are Morpheus users and very fanatical ones at that. They're hoping to be able to keep up to date on the whole Enron deal during their travel. They have no idea what "aaise" and "fucknozzle" mean but they're quite sure they'll find out about it sooner or later."

You know what sucks? Broadband connection costs only about US$35 per month (after a one-time fee of US$180 for cable modem, ethernet card and stuff) and you don't need a phone line to connect but I can't sign up for it because I live in the middle of nowhere! Grrr. If I only I lived a few more kilometres to the west, broadband connection would be mine. Sigh. ♥

I think having a road trip with Troy would be fun. I have good sense of direction. Good enough that you won't need a compass as long as you have me, though it doesn't guarantee that we won't get lost. Getting lost actually excites me since it challenges my so-called good sense of direction. I also can't sleep on anything that's moving, so I'd make a great companion for long drives. That is, if you prefer having a chatty companion to a quiet one. I tend to get chatty during a drive. And also annoying since I could sing the same tune over and over for hours on end. And the worst thing is I don't drive, so I'd probably make a lousy road trip companion after all :P ♥

I spent all night calculating how much my great escape would cost. Before I fell asleep, I concluded that it should cost around US$3000. Now if only robbing a bank weren't so risky... ♥

This morning I was supposed to be going to the wedding ceremony of the distant cousin I mentioned the other day. I was already all dressed up and ready to go when I noticed that my father was coming, too. According to the plan, he'd only come to the wedding banquet next week.

Anyway, my policy is that I should not be in the same room, let alone in the same car, with my father or I'll risk getting my feelings hurt by the things he says. He's not really the most sensitive man in the world, mind you. So I decided not to come along, which pissed my father off but what the heck.

I already have an excuse not to come to the wedding banquet next week. I have my college best friend's wedding to attend the next day. I can only handle one wedding in a week. Sorry.

(To whom it may concern, do not invite me to your wedding unless you find me a nice date first. Thank you.) ♥

Sunday Afternoon Haiku

I am so sleepy
I really wish I were home
So I could lie down.

I'm sitting in an internet cafe, using a computer with a very temperamental keyboard. The spacebar doesn't work very well. I'm supposed to be working on a design, but as usual, I'm not really inspired to actually do it. Maybe later.

I have to endure IE5 while I'm here, which sucks big time, and in my next booth, about 5 boys are making so much noises. I don't think they know how to use the internet at all. Also, since it's Sunday, there are plenty of users here so connection is even slower than usual.

I really should've stayed home today. But on second thought, if I were home, I'd have nothing to do but moping. Sigh. Why does life have to be so hard? ♥

If a friend in need is a friend indeed, then I have no friend at all. Not outside the internet anyway. How sad. Without the internet, it would be just me against the world! ♥

A distant cousin is getting married next week. His mother had been trying to reach my mum all morning but mum always found excuses not to talk to her. She was still mad at her because she didn't bother to come or have one of her children come to attend my brother's wedding.

Anyway, the cousin came to deliver his wedding invitation this afternoon. Driving his brand new Mercedes Benz, he parked his car in front of our house and in the process flattened my mother's favourite plants with his car tires. What a great entrance.

I felt kind of sorry for him. He was so apologetic but my mum was really, really mean. He said to my mum apologetically, "I am so, so sorry. I hope it was OK." And my heartbroken mum retorted, "Of course it was NOT OK!" I think he was very glad when he finally had to leave our place. Heh.

So many people I know are getting married this year and all of them are younger than me. I think life is trying to tell me something. ♥

When we were bored stiff at an aunt's place this morning, my brother gave me some "tattoos". He drew some silly stuff on my upper arms with a pen. On my right arm he drew a picture of an anchor and above it he wrote, "I [heart] Mama". On my left arm he made a drawing of a skull and a writing that says, "Warning: High Voltage". Very classy indeed.

The "tattoos" are already fading now, thanks to all the sweat. I wish I had a digital camera that I could use to immortalise them so you could see them and have a good laugh. I'm not interested in getting permanent tattoos, but if I had to have one, the tattoo would have to be a smiley :) ♥

Friday Evening Haiku

Hot day, rainy night
Rainy but very hot still
I think I'm melting.

The day was so hot that my brother and I couldn't stand it anymore and we decided to go for a drive to a place with air-conditioning. The nearby mall was our first destination. Once we'd had enough of the mall, we gave a bank a visit. We just stood there inside the room, enjoying the cool air while pretending to be in queue to use the ATM. We're weird that way, and weirder still, we actually had fun :) ♥